Codependent No More - Melody Beattie


I came across a recommendation for this book on a Louis Rossmann live stream. It piqued my interest and went on my to-read list. 

I assumed the book was for people who needed help deciding for themselves. This book is not that.

Codependents, as defined by its chapter in the book, are people in a relationship with alcoholics or addicts (substances or non-substances).


One of the core messages of the book is that of Detachment. 

Building upon this concept of Detachment, the author provides several tools and guides useful for codependents to lead meaningful lives.

Here are some of the quotes that the author uses to define Detachment and situations that may justify it -

Detachment is releasing or detaching from a person or problem in love/anger.

We stop worrying about them; they pick up the slack and start worrying about themselves.

If another person wants to do something embarrassing, let them. You haven't done anything to be embarrassed. You are still real, and you are still ok.

If the other singer gets off-key, do we have to get off-key…. Most of us react too much, and most of it is nonsense.

You didn't cause it; you can't control it, cure it.